Monday, January 17, 2011

Seeking Forgiveness

Poor Milo. On Saturday, he went to the vet to endure what no male ever wants to endure – neutering. Now, on top of the pain from that procedure, he has to sport this plastic cone of humiliation. It makes me sad to see him in this state. I poor out love and attention to ensure that his memory of this event will be erased and he will once again love me despite putting him through this. What a brave boy. Thankfully, all that outpouring of love pay be working. Milo licked my hand only moments ago. Oh it could be because I gave him his favorite treat, but I want to believe it's because he forgives me. Please don't burst my bubble. I'm very vulnerable.

Thursday, January 6, 2011

The End of the Holiday Season is Here.

I spent 3 hours volunteering down at the Bishop's Storehouse, stocking shelves this morning. Sarah came along to help and it was really fun having her there. Then I promptly fell asleep in the chair afterward. Where is my energy going? I think I may have a leak somewhere.

Today is the last of the holiday celebrations for Dave and I. This is the Italian Christmas which is called the Epiphany. This holiday celebrates families as the Good Witch Beatrice brings gifts that celebrate the families ancestry. I have celebrated this holiday since I went to New York to live in the Italian section of the city. I wish I were celebrating it with my brother Scott and his family, but I didn't get the word out in time. Hopefully next year, I'll do things better.

The Epiphany is great fun though. The thing I enjoy most is being able to cook my Great Grandma Saviozzi's lasagna for dinner. Right now, the aroma of lasagna is wafting throughout the house and my mouth is watering. But Stacy, what about your diet? ( I know you're wondering) Well, I have included extra spinach into the mix and less pasta in order to at least stay fairly close to the caloric intake that I can have today. The hard part is going to be trying to keep Dave from eating what is left after I take my single serving out.

I hope you have all had a wonderful holiday season and that this new year brings you great joy.
Enjoy your families today and have pasta if at all possible.

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Guess Who Came to Dinner?

At 4:35 yesterday afternoon, Miss Sarah A. touched down at the Salt Lake airport for 4 full days with Dave and I. I can't tell you how happy we are to have her all to ourselves for a few days. It will be so good to have her here and we may even spoil her just a tad bit. We just can't help ourselves.

Sarah lives in northern California near Sacramento with her sister Michelle and her parents Scott and Betty. Since Dave and I have been married this family has been the joy of joys. Dave and I have spent the most time with them and what a great time it has been. Is it because Scott is Italian and so am I? Is it because they make me laugh more than anyone else in the family? Perhaps it's because they are all just as crazy and spontaneous as I am. Whatever the reason, we love the time we spend with them and always look for ways to get together.

I hope we'll be able to give Sarah all that she needs right now. Dave and I want to make sure that this little break-y break will be uber fierce and give her just what she needs to finish up her senior year on a high note. We love you Sarah and are so glad you're here.

Tuesday, January 4, 2011

LESSON #1: Don't Let Yourself Go.

This morning at 4:00 am the alarm went off. It is day 2 of our exercise routine. Problem is...... I can't move. The very thought of moving tenses the muscles in my body and causes me pain. I'm surprised I'm not bleeding or in traction on some floor of the local hospital. Could I have been hit by a mac truck while sleeping? Did I tumble and fall off a 20 story building while sleep walking? There has to be some reason for this amount of pain other than a simple workout of stretching. Everything hurts!! Would Zumba have caused me this much discomfort?

I have to laugh at myself. What have I been thinking all these years? I heard the phrase “Use it or Loose it” and I did use it. I've always been a walker. I get out and walk a couple of miles a day and feel good about it. Although it's been a year since I've been at Curves – could I have really lost that much flexibility? The word is YES....

I'm also angry with myself. It seems really unfair that I spent 3 months on chemo therapy, throwing up everything I put in my mouth not to have lost any weight. How cruel is that? I lost my hair, my eye brows, my eye lashes, the hair all over my body actually – but I can't loose any weight? What is up with that? Does God just love me fluffy? I'm not sure what the answer is here, but the anger is propelling me forward in taking control and that is a good thing.

The lesson I have learned this morning as I finally crawl out of bed and struggle to lift my arms above my head to put on my work out shirt....... Don't let yourself go. Don't give in to the excuses. I may be hurting right now, but I won't be hurting like this for long. Soon I'll be working out like the girls on channel 2 news this morning doing the Zumba workout. I'll be smiling and clapping and moving like a gazelle. Energy will be dripping from every pore and I'll be looking all glowy and dewy and I may even loose some weight. For now – I need to go lay down. Tomorrow is another day and I need the heating pad. My parting thoughts are – Good luck to us all!!

Monday, January 3, 2011

New Year - New Beginnings

Thankfully, 2010 is in the record books. For us, it was a difficult year. You won't find many postings for 2010 on our blog because we were overwhelmed with life. In retrospect, we dealt with only 3 major issues. January found Dave living and working in Phoenix, Arizona at his new job with Integra Telcom which he started in October 2009. By the end of January 2010, I was undergoing chemo therapy and had lost my hair.

By March, Dave was blessed with a transfer from Phoenix to Salt Lake with Integra and I finished my chemo therapy. By May, my hair started to grow back in and by September, I became ill since my immune system was nearly non-existent. In October, I lost my job and found myself worried, upset and depressed.

2010 was not our best year, but we were blessed! We were blessed with help from friends, family and neighbors. I can't begin to tell you how people rallied around us from everywhere. Without the support of so many, we would not have been able to survive the difficulties we faced. I'm now convinced that I can handle anything life throws at me because of the support I have from the people around me. Dave and I learned a lot about each other this year. Those lessons are sure to be a gift of unmeasurable wealth in 2011.

Dave and I look forward to this new year. We are excited about the possibilities and anticipate great things to be achieved in 2011. We quietly sat down on New Years Day and discussed our goals and what we wanted to achieve this year. We came up with 3 goals this year. Since a goal isn't a goal until it's written down and shared, we are posting our goals. We hope this will help us remain focused throughout the year.

Our first goal is a Financial goal. We intend to reduce our debt this year. By the end of 2011, we intend to only have our mortgage and the remainder of one additional loan to pay off. Not only will this help us achieve the freedom that we want from our creditors, but it may show us that I don't need to work. We may be able to be foster parents or finally get the opportunity to adopt a child that we have been wanting to do for so long.

Our second goal is a Physical one. We have committed ourselves to working out 6 days a week and improving our diet. With much research and discussion, we have come up with a diet we feel will help us and an exercise regime that we hope will be varied enough to keep us focused throughout the year. We have not included any weight loss numbers in order to reduce the pressure, but we are certain weight loss will be achieved as we maintain the diet and exercise routine that we have committed to.

Our third goal is a Spiritual one. We have committed ourselves to attending the temple at least once a month and having daily prayer together. To many of you, this goal may sound silly, but it will be a stretch for us. With my cancer treatments in 2010 and my poor immune system, I have spent much of 2010 at home on Sunday's. On top of that, I didn't go visiting teaching once during 2010. 2011 will be a year of rebuilding good habits in the spiritual department. It will be easy for us not to go to church and not to attend the temple and not to magnify our callings. We desperately need to rebuild those good spiritual habits so that we can feel stronger and more balanced.

Happy new year everyone. We hope you are just as excited as we are for this new year and all its possibilities.

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

My Favorite Flower

I’ve always had a love for tulips and have often felt that they were my favorite flower. The tulip is so beautiful and full of color. They come into full bloom in April, which is my birth month, and once they are planted, they come back every year without fail. Somehow I’ve always loved that about tulips and perhaps that is why they are so near and dear to my heart.

Recently though, I’ve become obsessed with another flower and for totally different reasons. The lotus flower starts as a small flower down at the bottom of a pond in the mud and muck. It slowly grows up towards the waters surface, moving towards the light. Once it breaks the surface of the water the lotus begins to blossom and turn into a beautiful flower. I can’t help but see the connection between life in general and this flower. Just as the lotus grows from the mud into an object of great beauty, people also grow and change into something more beautiful.

This last year has brought me through some difficult times. Perhaps I’m so obsessed with this flower because I have gone through so much and I’m coming out of it. I have been at the bottom, in the muddy, yucky, dirty pond and am rising above to a new life. I’m not quite there yet, but I know it’s going to be glorious once I’ve broken that surface.